Thank you for your comments.
I was never in this parent-divorce situation, but my dad did start dating quickly after my mom died. He was dating in less than 2 months and married within 10 months. I resented my step-mother from the first day, but that's a different story.
Jason knows that his parents will never get back together and I think he's glad that now his dad has someone to talk to besides us. We can't be there every day or every week to keep him occupied, so hopefully she will fill that void even if it's just as a friend or girlfriend.
I can't answer for my SIL, but I thought she would have supported him finding someone because she has been on his side since she found out MIL was cheating on him. I would think that she would understand of all people because she is divorced and has remarried, but I guess it's different when you are talking about someone else's life.
Thanks again. :o)
1 comment:
After I responded, I pondered this situation a little more and wanted to add a few things.
FIL might truly be lonely. You said they were married about 30 years, right? And he is 52? So that means that he has pretty much been married his entire adult life. Married around 22?
Going from having a companion and having someone to come home to every night to being in a house all by yourself has to be hard. Not to mention how he ended up there.
This may be a rebound relationship or it may be something more, only FIL really knows. If he really even knows at this point.
Having this new woman move in may just be for the comfort of knowing that he doesn't have to spend every night of the week in a house all by himself. He will have someone to eat dinner with and watch a movie or TV show with. Maybe that is all he is wanting right now. Maybe that is all it truly is at this point. Just that companionship.
I loved living by myself but at times it was lonely. At times, I missed having someone around to just be there to hang out with in the evenings, if that makes sense.
This also might be his way of trying to process and get over the divorce. He may not be able (or want) to live alone right now.
I think my dad would be going through something similar if my grandma didn't live with him. My sister & Lucy are around but I don't think he would be doing very well if he didn't have someone else around to talk to some evenings, make sense? Especially last summer right after the divorce.
Maybe SIL is jealous b/c now FIL isn't bugging her as much? Maybe she enjoyed the drama of her being the one FIL went to? If that is the case. I say drama b/c I know that it would drive me batty and I would constantly complain about it if my dad were the one calling me, wanting to come over, etc...make sense? Maybe she feels threatened that this woman is going to take her dad away after they have become closer?
I don't know. I totally get the part of shacking up and mugging down, etc... in front of the kids but to not join them for a dinner out or a Sunday afternoon dinner? That is just childish and immature.
Also, not sure who did the chores in that household but FIL may just need some help scrubbing a toilet or doing laundry, ya know? I know that if DH and I were to divorce, he would have to hire a maid or this house would start growing science experiments. I don't think his mom would be too keen on having to come over and do laundry once a week. Don't get me wrong, she would but I don't think it would last for very long. Hee.
Anyway, I hope that helps and sorry this turned into such a novel.
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